I am not the person that I was five years ago, and feel the being that existed in me ten years before, was someone living a parallel life - a person that I could have been if I'd stayed on that path.
It was as a meandering road that we take when lost on our way - to where?
That was my questioning as a child.
'What is the purpose for all this?'
'Why am I here?'
'Where am I going?'
It was as if I wasn't aware that I was allowed to think of myself - for that would be selfish.
Life had to take me to a place where I was bought to my knees, where I came to realise that we can serve on this planet, but that this is not the same as giving up on ourselves.
We are here as energy contained within flesh and bone, and our vibration is the most important thing that we can take care of, that we are responsible for.
If our emissions are hectic, fragmented, sullied, sad, disjointed, flat, spikey or shardy, then everything around us is jagged because it is being affected by our presence.
When we are smooth and floaty, happy, up beat, gracious, joyful - when we are able to feel and be love - everything about us changes.
When water is pure and surrounded by music, laughter and love, it develops beautiful, delicate snowflake crystal shapes. This shows us just how important our emotion - energy in motion - is.
Firstly it is vital for our health and self healing. Filling ourselves up with love and positive self talk where we can see beauty in ourselves, where we accept ourselves exactly as we are.
Once everything is stripped away, our essence is rainbow coloured light. To return to this state is all that is required, for being this way it shows others how to be the same.
No words or demonstrations are needed. Just a heart that emits its soul song.
You are enough.
There is no need to seek love or approval from others. All is within ourselves. Happiness is a choice.
I remember when I first began to disengage with society en masse, and to spend more time in nature, amongst trees or listening to waves.
Healing took quite a long time - several years, until I was finally able to feel myself. My rhythm, my peace, my essence.
In the silence I slowly grew to know who I am, where I'm going and why I'm here and although others are involved in my life - and I love it when they are, for I can play with them a while, but they cannot detract from my truest nature - they can only enrich it.
The soul song journey requires a level of simplicity within ourselves where we can find joy and fulfilment in our lives as they are - not seeking, not wishing.
The joy of a sparkling rain drop, or the magical nature of a snowflake.
Once you can find joy around you, it is possible to build on it, with the positive energy radiating from you, attracting more of the same until suddenly it seems that the whole world is smiling with you.